Ghostly Sounds Of Self Destruct

(Karianne Gabaldon)

This is about a recovering bulimic who had a flashback of her purging days. It traumatized her to the point she had to contact her psychiatrist about her not believing she had an eating disorder even after being diagnosed. So in other words, she blames her flashback on her psychiatric doctor.

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(Verse 1) 
 
I’m laying down getting ready for bed, 
Until this image pops into my head. 
I try to ignore it but it takes me instead. 
(Takes me instead) 
 
It brings back my memories of my purging days, 
The haunting flashbacks that just won’t go away. 
I can’t wake up, I’ve blacked out, I need to say,  
that... 
 
(Pre Chorus) 
 
No matter what your mama says, 
Trauma ain’t in your head. 
Or at least the physical parts, 
The broken hearts that leave you scarred, 
Oh, 
 
(Chorus) 
 
Thank you; 
Thank you, thank you, thank you. 
For not believing in me, 
Now do you see, 
What is happening to me? 
 
You aren’t true; 
Aren’t true, aren’t true, aren’t true. 
Guess what comes next? 
Perhaps, 
A relapse? 
 
(Verse 2)  
 
I saw, felt and heard everything that went on, 
I even listened to a Pro Mia song, 
Then everybody went about how I’m not strong. 
 
(You’re not strong) 
 
You made me feel guilty, made me feel like shit, 
When all you had to do is just avoid this, 
Nobody blamed you, but honey I sure did. 
 
(And I still do) 
 
(Pre Chorus) 
 
You say I’m XXXX XXXXXX XXX X XXXX XXXXXXXX 
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XXX XXXXXXXXXX XXX XX XXXX XXXXXXX 
 
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XXX XXXX XXXX XXXX XXXXXX XXXXXX XXXX XX XXXXXXX 
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XXXXXXX XXX 
 
© Karianne Gabaldon 2020