Lifeline

(Casey Hartley)

A tragic story of a person stuck in an unfaithful relationship, and the conflict of feelings they feel as they fight between staying with someone they feel they can't live without but killing themselves in the process.

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Give me strength
Give me reason
One more chance
Then I’ll be leaving
I know I say this every time
But this time
I mean it

One more kiss
Into her neck
One more shot
To make amends
I know I say this every time
But this time
God knows I mean it

So don’t tell me that you’re sorry
Because I’ve heard it all before 
Don’t tell me that you’ll change
I don’t believe you anymore
And I know you’ll never change,
But one more chance
And maybe
We’ll be okay

Give me time
I won’t walk
I just need to have this talk
Let it sit
Let it simmer
God knows I’ll never walk

I need you
You’re my lifeline
You’re the only thing that’s mine
But you’re not all mine
And that is fine
It has to be

Write doormat on my forehead
And I won’t ever wash it off
I know I’m stupid
My mother’s told me
But without you I’d be lost

So delete their numbers from your phone
But it you don’t then it’s my loss
I won’t check
I’ll just wait
And pray for it to stop

So don’t tell me that you’re sorry
Because I’ve heard it all before 
Don’t tell me that you’ll change
I don’t believe you anymore
And I know you’ll never change,
But one more chance
And maybe
We’ll be okay

Three o’clock
I’ll wait up
Don’t break the silence
It’s too much
And as you stumble in
I’m wondering
Why the fuck I’m stuck

And no I won’t break out
And no I won’t calm down
I’ll roll over and forget
Just wipe the lipstick from your mouth

And don’t tell me that you love me
And don’t kiss the tears away
Don’t try to hug me into solace
Because tonight I’ll stay awake

Tossing and turning
And glaring into your soul
But I will stay
You make me whole.
© Casey Hartley 2019