Ripped Apart

(Karianne Gabaldon)

A song about rape and not being able to say no in the name of danger, so you blame yourself.

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(Verse 1) 
 
I sat outside wait for, 
A cigarette; 
A chance to self-sabotage, 
A chance to forget, 
All the things that you did, 
Keep on running through my head, 
A painted portrait, 
Of the living dead. 
 
(PreChorus) 
 
And I know it’s my fault, 
I should have never gotten in with you. 
And I closed the vault, 
To my inner feelings too. 
 
(Chorus) 
 
Find myself in bed, 
With a stranger in the day. 
I can’t understand why there is no fore play. 
 
I am scared, 
I am teared, 
I am ripped apart, 
Cry all day. 
 
(Verse 2) 
 
After you did your thing to me, 
You kicked me out of the house, 
I walk home shaking and lost, 
Wondering where I am now. 
 
Freaking out, fundamentally wrong in the head. 
You opened up my flower, 
But now my flower is dead. 
 
(PreChorus) 
 
And I know it’s my fault, 
And I wish it were different. 
On better circumstances, 
This may have been where I went. 
 
(Chorus) 
 
Lying on my back, 
You push hard, 
I close my eyes. 
I don’t want to visualize all your dirty little lies. 
 
“Be prepared”, 
Said I, scared, 
I am ripped apart, 
My world dies. 
 
(Bridge) 
 
And the harder you make things, 
By shutting off my switch, 
The harder you thrust and I hide my screams, 
My dreams, I see it. 
 
You don’t care, 
Stole my bear, 
All my teddy dreams, 
In my mind. 
 
Whoa, 
You say that I wanted it because I didn’t say no, 
Well I don’t think, people think I did, but I really don’t know. 
I am shattered, 
Beaten, battered, 
I’m lying here, 
Watching you go down, 
Down, 
Down... 
On me... 
 
(Hook) 
 
Stepping stones turn to water, 
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© Karianne Gabaldon 2021